Red Light = STOP, Stupid

If the mood strikes, I can be quite a dutiful daughter. That’s why, on a whim, I decided to take the train to CT to spend Mother’s Day with that lovely mom-o-mine. Fine, fine – it was pretty much (yet another) Katie’s Day, but time spent in the tranquil countryside did me good.

I took an afternoon train back and, armed with bags of purchases from a double-Daughter’s-Day worth of shopping, I hopped in a cab and headed downtown.

I was still riding high on the vapors of my Northwest Corner visit – the chirping birds, the lush greenery, seeing my beloved pooch, Coop-de-doop – but wham, bam, thank you ma’am, I was jolted back to urban life in a New York second.

Why do cabs and cars and buses feel the need to inch up at intersections when the light is red? I don’t understand. Red means stop. It does not mean go. It’s so senseless, useless, pointless. I mean the light goes from yellow to red, they slow then stop, and two seconds later they’re creepin.

Such creeps! For so many reasons.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. New York is a pedestrian city. Why don’t drivers get that? Why don’t they understand? It’s so frustrating to be crossing the street – legally, when the signal is white, not jaywalking – and cab drivers ease off the brakes.

They’re always inching and slinking and stealing forward.
They think they’re so badass, so threatening. Puh-LEASE, I think I’d feel pretty damn intimidating behind the wheel of a two-ton vehicle, too. Bullies.

There have been times when idiotic cabbies have been thisclose to bumping into me. And I’ve witnessed countless close encounters of cross-walkers and those ne’er-do-wells. Of course they’re in the wrong, but after I (and believe me, I can offer up a nasty-ass stink-eye), or the aforementioned strangers shoot them a dirty look, they actually have the nerve to HONK.

EW!

Quit yer pussyfooting, ya big yellow ninnies. Cabbies and car drivers and and MTA buses: You’re not gonna GET anywhere while the light is red. Or if you do, you’ll get a ticket. Or perhaps even a felony charge for manslaughter.

So annoying.

Please pedestries, until those nincompoops learn their lesson – be vewy vewy careful.