Spittin' AC's

Ahhh. Summertime. And the livin’s easy.

Well, at least there’s been a week or so of summertime. And my livin has certainly been easy - what, between my days off and my gym’s pool. Throw some Billie/Miles/Nina/Ella/Louis on the iPod and wham bam, thank you ma’am, I’s in heaven.

Heaven isn’t always a pretty, pretty picture though. Sometimes there’s melting snowman makeup faces and dripping popsicle back sweat.

No, no. No one likes a sweat ball.

And that, my friends, is why God invented air conditioning.

Who doesn’t love them some AC? It’s the best invention...well...since fire I suppose.

When summer hits, we all sacrifice our paychecks to the ConEd gods to keep our AC alive. Who can sleep in the heat? Who can eat in the heat? Who can LIVE in the heat?

No. Hot apartments just aren’t acceptable.

However, with the refreshing cold air, so too comes the not-so-refreshing drops of water.

My GOD, as if we city-dwellers don’t have it bad enough.

Ugh! Rain pouring so hard from the sky it seems like the world is going to end. Muddy, mucky, stinky street soup flopping up the backs of our legs, staining our white dresses. Crazy cab drivers splashing puddles all over us.

Noooooo. We have to have all sorts of Chinese water torture thrown our way.

It’s happened to everyone. And if it hasn’t happened to you, then you’re one lucky SOB.

There’s nothing worse than getting spit on by wayward, unruly, RUDE air conditioners. OK, well there are worse things but still...it’s so unfair!
Is it raining? AGAIN??

Was that bird shit?

Did someone just hock a loogie out the window?

Is someone pissing off the fire escape??
Oh no. No, no. It’s just a stupid selfish air conditioner who’s so mad that it’s working overtime, it just has to spit on you.

As if!

I suppose (realistically) that it's impossible not to encounter drippy air conditioners. Especially in this humid, soupy city. But come onnnnn inventors!! Why can’t you come up with a dripless AC unit? Why can’t you create a catch-all spit collector?

Bleh!